Witz Pickz: Holiday Gifts (Part 2 in the series)

There’s really no need to beat around the bush, and there will be plenty of time later to discuss whether or not anybody really wants a goat given to a village in their name. I mean, sure, it’s a nice idea, but I either want to be given a gift, or feel good about giving the village a goat myself. Having someone give a goat to a village as my Christmas or Hanukkah present means that I a) don’t get a present b) I don’t get to feel good about having given anyone anything and c) the person who gave me the goat DOES get to feel good. How is that any kind of gift? That’s just a purchase and a copout all rolled into one. And don’t get me wrong, I think giving the gifts to the villages is great—but maybe you should do it on, like, a Wednesday, not my birthday, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Easter, or any other holiday. Like I said, we can talk more about that later. Right now I’m gonna go straight for the throat of the holiday sales—video games.

If you’re young and in school, and can’t earn any money yourself, or more than $8/hr, then there’s not much of a problem here—you want a video gaming system and you’re thrilled to get it. Also, you maybe shouldn’t be reading this blog, but if you are, thanks! Anyway, if you’re slightly older like me, then you’ve already come to the point where you definitely know you don’t “need” a video gaming system, you wonder if the $400 or whatever dollars could possibly be worth it given all the time you spend working, sleeping, eating, watching tv, movies, reading, etc. and you have already been wracked with guilt over asking your parents to spend said money on such a gift for you. Ah yes, guilt. I don’t know when that happened and maybe it’s a sign of growing up, but I’ve started feeling incredibly guilty anytime my parents spend money on me to be nice and because they want to, but when I really don’t know if I “need” them too. Regardless, you’ve already dealt with this experience, but decided, forget it, you need a present, and those video gaming system are looking pretty good. So which do you pick?

All of my information is based on having played all three major systems (PS3, xbox360, Wii), reading lots of reviews and articles, and talking to people who already made this decision. I’ve figured out a few things and they primarily revolve around Video Quality, Games, Gameplay, and Bonus Features.

Video Quality: From all accounts, PS3 has both the best graphics and the highest potential for future graphics. For a lot of games, Xbox360 and PS3 are on even footing, but PS3 uses a different HD capacity and Blu-Ray discs, so they are able to fit almost three times as much information into their games as Xbox360. They also have a different processor and graphics card, which currently is another PS3 advantage. The PS3 is quieter and doesn’t overheat, unlike the Xbox360 which has proven overheating problems and is loud. Microsoft is releasing new models that are better with those two problems, but they aren’t labeling them differently, so the best bet is to wait until after the holidays clear out the shelves and then pick one up post-Christmas. Then there’s the Wii. The Wii does not compete with graphics because it’s not supposed to. The graphics are typical Nintendo graphics and while they can be good, such as in Tiger Woods, and Madden, they also have the fake looking people and in some of the more fun games such as Mario Party or the sports pack, they aren’t “people” so much as shapes and colors. Still, that’s because Wii is not yet for serious gamers. Which brings us to Games and Gameplay.

Gameplay & Games: The Wii is for all types of people, but not primarily for the intense gamers (and if the commercials are any indication, it’s for families who don’t speak to each other, the elderly, and older asian men). Far from a gimmick, the Wii technology is fun and engrossing, and I’ve heard playing games like Zelda is amazing. It also has a cool effect of making you want to do the things you’re doing in the game. I went bowling after playing Wii bowling. I bought a tennis racket after playing Wii tennis (yeah, I still haven’t used that). I broke four ribs after playing Wii boxing—ok that’s a lie, but I wanted to. The Wii is widely successful in non-gaming groups and demographics, and is fantastic for parties. Recently, I heard that it is being used in retirement homes to get older folks to move around and get some activity, especially if they’re in wheelchairs. Which is brilliant and I guarantee they can have as much fun as you or I playing the games. It is not, however, filled with finely tuned, photo-like graphics and environments. If you live a horribly dull, ennui-ridden, “I’d kill myself the next day if it wasn’t for the Netflix I have coming in the mail,” lifestyle, and need to completely involve yourself in a fantasy reality, the Wii is not for you. For that, you need one of the other two.

As I said, both have amazing graphics and this allows for intricate, engrossing gameplay. With a big TV and great storylines in most of their games, it is easy to get completely involved in the game you are playing and the world you are now a part of. On the xbox side, there are exclusive games like Gears of War, Halo 3, and BioShock, which I’ve heard is a system seller. I played Gears of War and loved it, especially the cooperative mode so I could play it with my friend at his house. PS3, on the other hand, has games like Metal Gear Solid 4, Final Fantasy, Gran Turismo, and Heavenly Sword, all of which are amazing stories, graphics, and, with the exception of Heavenly Sword, franchise hits. All the sports games are for all three systems, so if you’re like me, and get way too into playing as your favorite team, connecting mythical (read: superstitious, lucky) power to your season and reality, and enjoy creating yourself and friends in games, all three systems are options. Rock Band is also available on multiple systems, and is incredibly fun—like the Wii only with music for all systems.

Bonus Features: PS3 also functions as a Blu-Ray disc player. Bam. It also connects via wi-fi to your computer and acts like an external hard-drive. This means you can play video files from your computer through your television. It also means your PS3 is probably watching your porn once you fall asleep. Nothing like this for the Wii, and I’m sure Xbox360 has some kind of wi-fi connectivity, especially with Media Center, but I honestly don’t know about it. The internet being important, it’s important to note that PS3 has free online gaming while Xbox inexplicably still has a subscription based access. You have to pay an annual fee to play your games online and get new content.

So that’s my long, mostly unfunny explanation of the three systems. Can you tell I’m thinking about it? If anyone has any more information, bias, experience, or preference, drop some comments.

I’ll Pick Something Ridiculous Tomorrow, Ok?,
Witz