What Is Witz Pickz?

Sometime before the turn of the century, after frogurt, but before gogurt, Jon Witz was born and began doing things. Some of these things involved rollerblades, but they mostly involved pizza and sometimes they involved nerf guns. Once, all three were combined, and that day is now known as Martin Luther King Day. In the years following, Witz came in contact with more and more things in this world. Cargo pants, pixie stix, laser tag, and one time, a baby chipmunk. That chipmunk was cute as hell, but it would have been better if it were a monkey. I've still never hungout with a monkey. Anyway, as Witz encountered more and more things, he learned to do one of two things with them: pick them (Snapple, Anti-Flag, Didgeridoos), or not pick them (slugs, mountain dew, cowboy lassos). This website is dedicated to spreading the word on what Witz Pickz, and what Witz Doesn't Pick(z). Because there's too much stuff out there not to babble ridiculously on about everything on a stupid blog. Witz Pickz you! Because only you can prevent forest fires (which Witz Doesn't Pick) and triple-thick milk shakes (which Witz Pickz!)

-Witz-