Witz Pickz: Wednesday Matinee

Clearly this week is mostly about rhyming with a significantly lower emphasis on content. But still, why not rejoice in the consistency of pickz and the glory of being able to count on a routine. Granted, in a week or so when I leave town for a few days, I'll shatter that routine and leave you crying, broken, and probably hungry (if you're anything like me) on the floor, but for now-- REJOICE! PICKZ ABOUND!

Witz's Veggies In My Belly(s) Sandwhich: I think I'm turning veggenese, I think I'm turning veggenese-- I've been substituting meat for other things a lot lately and I'm not proud of it. I don't know exactly what's going on, but what with the Neverending Overtly Menacing Sickness I've had for almost three months now, I'm trying to eat healthier. This led me to eat the unfathomably delicious El Guapo sandwhich at the unfathomably delicious sandwhich restaurant The Honey Hole in Seattle. Veggies and smoked gouda all baked tremendously together on a crisp roll-- so so good. I recently decided to try and match the experience without having access to the actual 'which. So I substituded a few ingredients to fit my budget and tastes and came up with Witz's Veggies In My Belly(s) Sandwhichz (silent z)! Here's what you do:

Ingredients:
-Tomato (sliced)
-Lettuce (Whatever kind you want)
-Mushrooms-Zucchini/Squash
-Cheese (Gouda or Fontina or Cheddar or Mozzarella)
-Red Pepper-Italian Bread or crunchy roll
-Italian Dressing or Ranch Dressing

Sautee:
-Zucchini/Squash cut into thin circular slices
-Mushrooms (cut into slices)

Bake at 350 (primarily because my oven doesn't go any higher):
-Cut bread and bake open halves with stuff on top
-Place cheese, tomato slices on one half
-Place lettuce and dressing on other half
-Bake for about 5 minutesPour sauteed veggies on top of tomato halfClose sandwhich

EAT IT DELICIOUSLY

Trust me, it's worth the money for the ingredients and will pay out a number of sandwhiches, not just one.

Gentleman Auction House: I just reviewed these guys for KZSU radio ("Live From Six Feet Underground" with your host DJ Witz airs on kzsulive.stanford.edu from 12am-3am PST wednesday nights/thursday mornings for a potentially limited time) recently with fairly low expectations. I was blown away! These guys sound enough like Bright Eyes and The Arcade Fire and The Decemberists to fit nicely into a genre, but are extremely creative and have great lyrics. The EP "The Rules Were Handed Down" deals with themes of growing up and maturing, sometimes naturally, sometimes before one should have to, and sometimes not yet or never. There are tons of different instruments utilized in each song and they blend perfectly to construct an album with tremendous breadth and depth. Check them out on myspace.

Jonah Hill: Welp, I saw Superbad and loved it-- was intimidated by it's funny-- was inspired by it's writing and success. But I also saw "Accepted" (from the library-- remember?), which was less amusing, although Justin Long (my new fave awkward since Die hard 4) did a pretty good job of making unfunny material funny. The common link between the two movies was Jonah Hill-- you know, the overweight friend... Jonah has an incredible knack for timing and intonation and especially improvisation (yeah, I watched the outtakes and making of "Accepted"-- so what? I have a little time on my hands-- you should be jealous of me). He's not the usual "fat guy" funny sidekick. He steals movies. He doesn't steal movies in the way that Walmart suspects anyone of color to steal movies or like how people say downloading is stealing-- he takes the sidekick role and makes you want him to be the lead. When he's not onscreen, you are waiting for him to be onscreen. It's pretty cool and it turns out that HE was pretty cool growing up to, according to his time on Loveline where I was first introduced to him (oh yeah, right, I uh, lisen to Loveline sometimes still on my way home from things...THINGS..I do THINGS...and not just so I can hear Loveline!). So here's to Jonah Hill, who I wish a successful career and who should someday help me make a movie.

"A long hundred": My friend who writes over at The Wonder Yak and I were trying to figure out what a seven person group is called (answer: a septet-- we felt dumb after we found out) and inadvertently stumbled upon the fact that the number 120 is sometimes referred to (I have no idea by whom) as "A LONG HUNDRED." 20 is ONE-FIFTH of a hundred. What is the scenario where you have 1/5th more of something and feel like it's ok so it becomes a standard phrase (other than lunchmeat-- I'm a little tired of asking for 1/2 a lb of something and getting 3/4 of a lb. It happens so regularly that I now under order by about 1/4 in order to get the amount I wanted. Has the deli counter job lost that much specialization in the last ten years? And also, why's it called "lunchmeat?" Isn't it just meat that I can eat whenever the hell I feel like it?? This is why I make veggie sandwhiches)? And if we're going to accept a long hundred, shouldn't we say that 130 is a longer hundred? 140? Where does it stop? Is the opposite true? Is 80 a short hundred? I'd be pissed if I only got 80 of something when I ordered 100. Can I refer to my penis as "a short hundred"? If someone wants to tell me that 120 is a "long hundred" they at the very least need to use some friggen UNITS so I know what they're referring to. "A long hundred" of grains of rice is different from "a long hundred" of oncoming tanks. I wouldn't want to run "a long twenty-six" marathon, but I'd be ok running the "a long 100" meter dash. I can only hope that in this age of computers and global shipping, "a long hundred" is obsolete vernacular. I truly, truly hope.

A medium hundred posts and counting,
Witz

P.S. Seriously though, if you are even remotely capable, checkout my radio show, hear my soothing radio voice, and solve the mystery of Witz that has plagued you for so long.

"Live From Six Feet Underground" with your host DJ Witz airs on kzsulive.stanford.edu from 12am-3am PST wednesday nights/thursday mornings for a potentially limited time