Witz Pickz: Quick Pickz

Busy busy day today. Here are some pickz that aren't funny, but will help you get through a snowstorm in a cabin, and isn't that equally important?

Feeding the Monster by Seth Mnookin: I just finished reading this book about the John Henry, Larry Lucchino, Tom Werner, Theo Epstein era Red Sox, and was very impressed by it. Ordinarily, I don't find myself reading any sports books or books about sports, even by reporters, but this book came highly recommended from my friend over at The Hot Corner, so I gave it a whirl. Quick reading and insightful journalism were the keys to the book being a success, and I don't think you need to be interested in baseball and the Red Sox so much as business, sports psychology, or mathematics to enjoy it. Plus, you get to hear all the crazy stuff Sox players said and did, such as Big Papi saying bye to the press everyday by saying, "Now go home and get some ass!" or Kevin Youkilis responding to being called The Greek God of Walks by saying, "It's better than being called 'The Greek God of Illegitimate Children'," or when being interviewed for SI for Kids, Pedro Martinez saying this:

SI: Favorite color?
Pedro: Green.
SI: Faovrite book?
Pedro: Whatever.
SI: Favorite Actress?
Pedro: Sandra Bullock.
SI: Secret Ambition?
Pedro: I would like to fuck Sandra Bullock.
(SI explains that's not acceptable response for a children's magazine)
Pedro: I would like to sleep with Sandra Bullock.

That's awesome, right? Read the book.

Songs For Moms: I just discovered this female trio yesterday and am already a big fan. Local to the Bay Area, these three create one upbeat, energetic, indie-folk-rock-bluegrassy song after another, and they're all ridiculously catchy. Check em out at myspace.com/songsformoms

Dexter: IS STILL SOOOOOO GOOOD. SEASON TWO IS BRILLIANT. Same goes for House.

Converse All-Star: But not the ones you're thinking of. The ones you're thinking of are from back in the day and with my flat feet make me look like I'm wearing clown shoes. THESE Converse All Stars are the new model, or at least one of them. A regular shoe with regular materials and a pseudo-suede feel to the exterior, they have a sewn on star patch that makes them look throwback, but still feel new and cool. I'm totally diggin' the brown ones I bought and they are quickly approaching "Top Buys Ever" status, as they were only forty bucks and are exactly what I need. Other "Top Buys Ever" of mine include my 30 dollar blue jacket from Bob's, MVP Baseball 2004 for xbox (I don't imagine too many other people are on year 2010 having played every game of all those seasons), and the brown blazer I got for 40 bucks from J.Crew and wear at least 1/3 of the year. "Buys That Went (Not-So Shockingly) Wrong" include my 60 dollar cowboy hat (which I've worn about 15 times in the four years I've owned it), The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen for 20 bucks (I haven't even touched it to read), and my acoustic guitar ($250) that I said I was going to learn to play and have in the last four years only fought out 2 or 3 songs made up entirely of power chords. The only one I regret is the book.

2006 Chateau de Brandey Bordeux: I got this wine for 15 bucks at Beverages & More during a sale where you get another bottle for 5 cents. So I got it for $7.50 essentially and it was great. I think it was ranked at 90 pts or more, and had all kinds of interesting flavors and the slight sharp edge that apparently I've come to learn I like. If you need a good wine and want to spend a few bucks on it, try this one.

MLB Bloopers: I couldn't believe it when I read the Netflix thing and saw that this DVD was 90 MINUTES LONG! How is that even possible?? Turns out it was only 60 minutes long, and they blatantly lied. But it was still slightly enjoyable. People falling down, bad base-running, behind the scenes interviews and pranks were enjoyable because you got to see players' personalities (Tim Hudson is awesome), Harry Caray impressions, and COOL HANDSHAKES. I mostly enjoyed the cool handshakes. My biggest complaint was that effing Chris Kattan was the narrator and kept talking over the clips and ruining the ability to hear the players joking around. And ohhhh boy, you're gonna be stoked to see how many Grounds Crew bloopers there are....

I also realized that by renting MLB Bloopers from Netflix, I was potentially raising a suicide watch on myself. After all, what are the last stages before suicide besides being unhappy about job situation, financially concerned, having watched the "Faith Rewarded" Red Sox 2004 World Series DVD the night before until 3am, and having MLB Bloopers sent to your house by Netflix? They probably thought they were one day away from someone finding me dead on the couch, wrists slit, Safeway Brand Cookies in my lap, and MLB Bloopers on the goddamn tv.

Suddenly Inundated With Job Offers...I Mean Inebriated With Wine Boxes,
Witz

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