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Monday, January 26, 2009

Witz Pickz: Back In Action

Work has kept me busy for the last week or so and so Witz Pickz has been absent. To be fair, I really wanted to ask you all to bear with me, but I then realized that I have no idea how to spell it. My instincts say it's "Bear with me," but then it kind of looks like I'm either asking you to place yourself in the midst of wild life danger or am telling you that I am currently being accompanied by a Bear. "Where's Witz? He better not be with that goddamn bear again!" It leaves the door open for the outside chance that I'm hanging out with Man vs. Wild host Bear Grylls, but let's be honest, if I was invited to hangout with Bear Grylls, I'd have to decline on behalf of my entire immune system.

Bear: Let's jump in this frozen lake, just to see what happens!
Witz: What happens is that I'll get a cold.
Bear: Let's sleep in this leafy mud hut just to see how we do!
Witz: I'll get a cold is how I'll do.
Bear: Let's get naked by this cavee for no real reason other than it's satisfying to feel your balls against Mother's Nature's bounty!
Witz: No.

The other option is "bare with me," which sounds like I want everyone to get naked Bear Grylls style and come hang out. It'd be really awkward if everyone did show up naked and I was just chillin' fully clothed. Never in my entire life has somebody asked me, "Who do you want to hangout with naked" and answered, "EVERYBODY!" I'm not entirely sure anyone ever asked me "Who do you want to hangout with naked," at all, but if they did, I bet it was weird and hopefully I didn't answer "YOU!"

So that's my weak-ass post for today-- telling you that I can't post, but will be back tomorrow with some attempts to make your life a little better, or at least, make that 2:34 on your clock turn into a 2:36 without too much pain.

"Witz Didn't Seem All That Back In Action Today...,"
Witz

1 comment:

Mangia said...

Great blog post, thanks for sharing